In April I went to Roatan. That’s my excuse for not entering a post. LOL Actually, April was tough. Lots of emotion. Mike and I ran away from LA and to an island.  I learned that I cannot snorkel, BUT I got better at it. One day I may even be a snorkeler.  (Don’t hold your breath) (that was snorkel hour)

A thing I realized, that I write here to remember, is maintenance. like running costs in theatre…. I wonder why I wait to get massaged when myt back is so sore I cannot move my arm or vacay when I am so on edge the first 3 days of said vacay I pace and can’t even read.  I massage people for Gods’ sake.. I know better. But like most I don’t take what advice I give.  SO after running away I had to sit down and listen to advice. Listen to the Wind and the Earth (also slow the fuck down) and be present. Being a writer and not writing has also been tough. It has always been my main outlet. A few hours of writing, a walk, wine with the tribe and I am GOOD! How do I keep forgetting myself. It makes me sad. My health should mean more to me. SO new rules new guidelines, new ideas new wants and new care. Had to go back to some very rudimentary meditations and behavioral modifications.  I think I got so swept up in all the upheaval and newness of the bear I forgot to maintain and be. I guess that’s what happens with life-altering shit. So I’m not mad or anything.  I’d like to move forward and enjoy all the moments. Remember to enjoy the trip. You didn’t work this hard to not be happy. Fucker!

ALSO I got like  4 massages this month! Lol