SO. It has been a weird few weeks. Too much travel. LOL and too much inner travel HA! Is that possible? I’ve been working here and there on different little projects. I really want to start making audio or possibly video works of all of my prayers and chants and spells and stuff!!! I think they’ll be a really excellent way to spend my time and energy… especially in this crazy political world full of haters and weird shit. But we’ll see if I have the bandwidth?? I really hope I do, but right now, I need to focus on my Brighton and London performances and make those awesome!! I’ve been re-examining a lot of old stuff, especially the drink fek fight, and I think I could really make this something very cool, but once again, I find myself wondering how much bandwidth I have and what I need to focus on. What merits focus in this crazy world?  I want, no I need to, believe in what I’m doing and why I’m spending my energy because uncle David gets tired lol but I guess it’s a good thing…. spring cleaning, new energy, new beginnings, reworking’s…?  I guess it’s a very pagan spring thing to do.

ALso: I mean what is shadow work and why do we do it especially at my age I mean really. I think I mentioned that I was working with a therapist because I was writing this really heavy book about sort of my childhood but obviously not and it’s just brought up so many crazy things but it’s good but I also didn’t realize how much monsters that final monologue how hard that really is and where my head goes I mean I’m glad and I think it’s worthy of navigating the shadow realm but at the same time I mean it’s the freaking shadow realm it’s not like that’s like a fun place to be and I keep getting new memories and images and stuff and that’s hard.

Note to Self: The person at the door. Where will that image be when I re-read this?