It’s interesting, sequoias can only grow in a very specific climate. If it’s too wet, like in this marsh, they can’t grow and if it’s too dry, obviously they can’t grow… but it’s a specific specific environment in which they thrive! And they become huge! I mean, obviously, they have adaptations like engrossing their trunks when it gets a little wet. So having seen and touched them again.. oh what a tree-hugger I am!! The connection I felt to these giants was stunning. It made me  think….   I wonder what that means, how that parallels  our ownn lives? Like when and where do we thrive? How specific does our environment need to be for us to get shit done. To become giants! To be fierce, ferocious, and everything we can become?

We all struggle with having enough time to do things in our day but I wonder like what’s our perfect environment to grow do we need a certain amount of joy, a certain amount of quiet time, a certain amount of group time, quality food, quality water ,maybe the occasional chocolate cake lol Where is it that I feel hardiest and can grow strongest? I don’t have any answers to any of this. I’m just kind of rambling and thinking about it. I’ve been doing a lot of rambling and wondering and wondering lately. I’m working out a new video project, stories in the cauldron and it is inspiring!

I get to weave and entangle stories and magic back and forth and forth and back it’s like a Is….

Ok I fucking hate fucking Google okay so what I was saying was God damn it hate voice texting on Google it’s so terrible why does it erase everything I’ve written like five times in a row I’m so frustrated right now

okay

take a deep breath go back to that really happy place you were 3 to 5 minutes ago when Google started just erasing everything okay

so just saying is

Stories from The Cauldron has been really lovely to work on, even on paper. It feels strong and it feels like something I’m really meant to do. I went to the Sequoias and shot my first video… in hindsight I should not have shot the first video on location by myself that was a really dumb move because I haven’t shot a movie in like 12 plus years so I couldn’t remember what is aspect ratio, what is white balance…. all that stuff LOL I just completely forgot, so the footage might be terrible. And to be honest, I am a coward and have not even looked at it because I don’t want to be disappointed. However, if it does suck, I can always do it again in a different way and possibly bring someone with me.

I did manage to shoot on my phone camera a bunch of really cool videos of Nature. I downloaded all of those cuz I really want to get back to that idea I had about 1-minute meditations. Cuz I think that’s something really important that people need right now. I think I got my head around it finally…. what that feels like and looks like. I don’t know… this the storytelling and magic and these little mini meditations really resonate. I feel like it’s definitively me. I’m being definitely me…. and I haven’t felt that way in a really really long time. So, I guess this is awesome and just a touch scary and nerve-wracking. I keep finding other reasons to do something else because what if this is Definitively Me? and it’s perfection!?!?!?!??!?!  LOL there’s no such thing as perfection in art, let’s all just own that, but you know what I mean……